Whichever type you currently feel, this is for you...

The Essential Aspects

Introduction - The Light Shines Brightest in the Darkness

When we lose good things in our life, for any reason whatsoever, we are not abandoned to the domain of death, but rather, as the Catholic understanding of the Kerygma indicates, God offers us a path through this life and not around it. This program asserts that our path to healing begins with recognizing that we were created good, though our collective sinfulness has brought suffering and death—both literal and symbolic—Christ leads us back through both universal and specific means of grace, He takes on our journey, sharing in its bitterness, while the Church supports us in our trials, and in turn, we are sent forth to continue our healing by ministering to others. This program should provide a relatively holistic approach to conflict and post-conflict relational discernment of God’s will. Although the curriculum will be concerned with general situations, the individual will be assisted in applying the premises to their particular situation. This program will have two thrusts, the first in the direct area of logic and investigation, and the other in dialogue with God (including what He has already said or revealed) concerning the issues involving the conflict or post-conflict situation. Ultimately, in order to grieve properly we must follow no different path than the one God brought man through after our sin. “Even in the most serious conflicts, the unity of lived faith based on the Gospel remains the guiding compass.”

What situations would this apply to?

First, this program could be used by anyone working through a breakdown of relations in any close relationship, healthy or otherwise. This program would aim to illuminate the effects of sin, both the original and actual (including even third parties), on relationships i.e. breakdown. This would most especially help with those considering divorce, recovering from a divorce or separation, and even a breakdown in family and community relationships. Someone may also take the program as a formation for (formal) ministry or for helping friends through such situations (informal ministry).

Second, this curriculum is designed to help contextualize any form of suffering. Additional emphasis may be placed wherever necessary, depending on the needs of the suffering persons and the nature of their suffering. In any case, suffering arises from a lack, deprivation, removal, or absence of some good that is at least categorically necessary, the particular expression may be otherwise. Even if an individual case allows for some adjustment, trauma can make it difficult to adapt to new circumstances. This is where the ministry of presence (which you, the leaders, provide) and the ministry of truth (which this study should assist you in offering) become especially important. By emphasizing the proper context of suffering within God's broader plan and offering a space for the suffering to express their suffering and share in that of others, this curriculum aims to help guide both leaders and those they serve.

Who can lead this and in what expression?

Anyone who:

• has experience navigating suffering with faith

• can share their experience in a relatable way to others without negleccting truths of faith

• is a party to someone who could benefit from guidance through prayer and theology to help them navigate such situations healthily and faithfully

• is not currently in dire need of the help themselves (or else they should simply walk with others in the similar circumstance or be led themselves in a time of hurt)

Ideal expressions of use:

1. Parish(es): this would allow for a greater experience and diversity of current experience helping to both help the individual apply the curriculum in an ongoing fashion (recognizing this applies to many situations and magnitudes) and offer them the confidence to speak with others in their parish about their struggles, testimony and so enter into their own ministry to those who suffer in similar ways. Here are three possibilities based on the scheduling v. suffering intensity needs:

   1. Weekend Retreat, with meals

   2. Monday thru Saturday Evening Retreat with supper

   3. Lenten Journey - meeting once a week for 6 consecutive weeks

2. Faith Groups: although the parish program expression is preferred, if a parish staff is too busy with other obligations, this may be more necessary where the direction of Evangelization and discipleship delegates the main thrust of this effort to a faith leader. This expression has the benefit of help foster discipleship and fraternity amid parish community faithful.

3. One-on-one: If a parish program is unavailable, a close friend or family member can accompany a suffering person through this study. Focus on prayer and presence rather than exhaustive content. Begin each session with intercessory prayer, using the study’s opening prayers. Discuss key themes briefly. Incorporating optional content is highly recommended. Prioritize adoration and prayerful reflection over structured teaching—walking with, not leading, in the journey of healing. Ultimately the content is supposed to help prayerful reflection, so the priority is what is helpful for the person you are navigating suffering with and the intensity.

What does the curriculum look like? How does it flow?

1. We recognize that we were made good, and no sin (we commit or those against us) can remove the inherent goodness of our identity (cf. Luke 15; 10:25-37). Though sin diminishes this goodness, it never fully eradicates it, and before addressing our trials, we must acknowledge this truth. Gratitude helps us remember the good in each other and our relationships, preventing false narratives in times of conflict or loss. 

2. We reflect on how sin, as the source of suffering, also highlighting the goodness that remains, prompting us to seek truth by discerning what led to relational breakdowns. 

3. We acknowledge that without truth, there is no real communion to restore, making repentance and forgiveness of real wrongs committed essential in reconciliation. Much like on must acknowledge the reality of loss if one is to heal. Surrendering pain and painful realities to God allows His justice—His love (willing what is good) in action—to bring healing and set things right. 

4. We recognize that accepting the truth frees us from psychological defenses and opens us to God’s grace, inviting us to place our burdens in His hands. He invites us into His body the Church in the context of which our pain is felt, and we are loved in our reality. 

5. We reflect on how, through suffering, God transforms us, calling us into deeper communion with Him through prayer, the sacraments, and His Church, where true restoration is found. Then, at the completion of our journey on Earth, we (through purification as needed) attain the fullness of health, freedom from ever painful and regrettable defect.

What Are the Key Sources of Faith this draws upon?

We would aim to employ scripture often, but essentially the Kerygma, the essential story of scripture, is the foundation. 

“God, infinitely perfect and blessed in himself, in a plan of sheer goodness, freely created man to make him share in his own blessed life. For this reason, at every time and in every place, God draws close to man. He calls man to seek him, to know him, to love him with all his strength. He calls together all men, scattered and divided by sin, into the unity of his family, the Church. To accomplish this, when the fullness of time had come, God sent his Son as Redeemer and Savior. In his Son and through him, he invites men to become, in the Holy Spirit, his adopted children and thus heirs of his blessed life.”

The fundamental premise to this approach is the idea that, “veritas vos liberabit” or “the truth will set you free” (John 8:31-32). Thus, the work being done is clearing away the lies such as, “If I am truly at fault, even partially, then I am unlovable,” through the truth of the Gospel. In human conflict, a clear and absolute victim typically emerges only in extreme cases—when one party, driven by severe delusion, commits an unprovoked crime against a stranger, creating a narrative of “I was merely minding my own business when I was attacked.”  There is no control one has over others' decisions except those taken by oneself concerning the other which may inspire virtue or tempt to vice in the other. As such, in a fallen, but otherwise good world, sometimes we can overestimate either our victimhood or our corruption, and neither distortion should be held as truth if we are to have productive conflict. It is often said that God brings the best out of bad situations, but do we accompany Him in that (Romans 8:28; Matthew 5)? The next major objective is addressing the truth of the situation according to what Christ has taught us. Indeed, this includes “loving one’s enemies,” but also navigating whether the other is truly an enemy. In this program, we will pursue forgiveness—surrendering an offense to God's mercy and justice while striving to see the person beyond the offense—for our own spiritual well-being (Galatians 6:2). Additionally, we will seek reconciliation, the restoration of communion, for the good of all, insofar as it is possible (Ephesians 4:32; Ephesians 5:21; Matthew 6:14-15).  Indeed, the Domestic Church is likely to be most replete with personal conflict on account of the near, absolute unity of two fallen and broken people which is its foundation. For this, Amoris laetitia will be consulted frequently. Thus, the progression and the content of the curriculum situate itself under the aegis of the Magisterium and Scripture, equipping the participants for the present and future situations they may encounter like the one(s) that opened their interest in this program.

What practical offerings should be considered for this program?

Personnel

1. Point person/Main Volunteer or Church Ministry staff to Supervise, Emcee, and Coordinate volunteers for all tasks delegated

2. Ideally, there would be several volunteers, both men and women of a variety of ages, definitely at least 1.

   1. There will be a speaker giving a talk based on the guidelines for a particular session, and ideally not the same person more than twice

   2. Prayer team volunteers would be ideal as well.

3. Ideally, a Catholic psychologist would be paid to come and talk with anyone who desires the potential psychological benefit and to help watch for suicidal ideation, the particular needs of the mentally handicapped, or offering specialized professional advice for the.

4. Ideally, a priest for spiritual direction and sacramental administration.

Ideal Schedule for Each Sessions (Each block as short as 40 minutes or as long as 3 hours and 15 minutes)

1. First session welcoming table with registration, provided materials, and cost 

2. Announcements and Talk (15 to 30 min)

3. Prayer/Journaling Time (15 to 60 min, perhaps varying between sessions, ideally with optional adoration (at least once) with confession available (at least once))

   1.  This can be a flexible time for one-on-ones if desired, especially with the program/lecture leaders, and only during prayer times if there is not time for something else

   2. Prayer team volunteers would be ideal as well.

4. Ideally One-on-one and/or small group time (0 to 30 minutes, perhaps during prayer time if time constrained)

   1. Ideally, at least one Mass together, amid the sessions, especially if weekend retreat style.

5. Break and Closing

   1. If end of day, then Closing remarks, announcements, and prayer (15 Minutes)

   2. Break and Transition to next talk (10 Minutes)

6. Some community time at the end of each session is ideal

Recommended Miscellaneous items

1. A registration and advertisement campaign beginning 3 weeks prior - notification of cost (fundraising efforts where possible)

2. Every session should incorporate some comfort food (if not a meal) for breaks, for when tears or processing takes much effort.

Tasks Leading up to the First Session of the Program

Consult coordinate with priest and parish staff concerning:

1. Scheduling/Room availability

   1. Any other events going on to be mindful of

2. Legalities, any relevant waivers for use of facilities and hosting participants, rules for use, protocols for situations, etc.

3. What involvement the Priest would like/is available for

   1. Adoration?

   2. Confessions?

   3. One-on-One spiritual direction?

4. How to close parish if scheduled at night/as needed

   1. Light switches

   2. Hex Keys

5. What configuration rooms need to be left in

6. Technological needs if any

7. Advertising

8. Determine Small Groups based on Suffering Category

Appendix

Handouts

Coming Soon!

Works Cited

Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC)

Catechism of the Catholic Church. 2nd ed. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 1997.

Sacred Scripture (Holy Bible, NRSVCE)

• Genesis 1:26-27, 1:29-31, 2:9, 2:16-17, 3:6-24

• Exodus 55-56

• Psalm 147:19-20

• Isaiah 7:14, 49:15-17, 52:13-53:12, 54

• Wisdom 1:13, 2:24

• Matthew 7:11, 10:29-31, 10:34-36, 16:24-25, 22:1-14

• Luke 11:13, 12:32, 13:49-53, 15:11-12, 15:17-20, 15:21-24, 15:25-28, 15:31-32, 19:41-44

• John 1:1-5, 1:9-14, 1:16-18, 1:29-34, 1:10-13, 1:16-17, 3:5-6, 3:16, 11:25-26, 11:30-44, 12:23-26, 13:1-5

• Romans 4:13-25, 5:1-11, 5:12, 6:11-14, 6:23

• 1 Corinthians 15:31, 15:54-55

• 2 Corinthians 5:8, 5:19

• Galatians 2:20, 5:22-23, 6:1-3

• Ephesians 4:11-14

• Philippians 1:21, 2:6-8

• Colossians 1:15-16, 2:9

• 1 Timothy 3:16

• Hebrews 1:3, 2:14, 4:15, 9:27

• 1 Peter 2:4

• 2 Peter 1:4, 3:15

• 1 John 3:2

Papal and Magisterial Documents

• Benedict XVI. Encyclical Letter on the Christian Hope, Spe Salvi. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 2007.

• Apostolic Exhortation on the Church in the Middle East: Communion and Witness, Ecclesia in Medio Oriente. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 2011.

• International Theological Commission. Doctrinal Document on the Select Questions on the Theology of God, the Redeemer. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 1995.

• John Paul II. Apostolic Exhortation Reconciliatio et Paenitentia. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 1984.

• Address to a Group of Bishops from the United States of America on Their Ad Limina Visit, 8 July 1988. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana.

• General Audience on the Most Holy Trinity, 5 April 2000. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana.

• Address on the Courage to Take a Risk for God’s Promise, 56th World Day of Prayer for Vocations. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 2019.

• Francis. Encyclical Letter, Laudato Si’. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 2015.

• Pontifical Commission for the Protection of Minors. Memory and Reconciliation: The Church and the Faults of the Past. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 2000.

Patristic and Theological Works

• Irenaeus of Lyons. Adversus Haereses. Book IV, Chapter 20, §7. ca. 180 AD.

• Robert Spitzer. The Light Shines on in the Darkness: Transforming Suffering Through Faith. San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 2017.

Liturgical and Ecclesiastical Texts

• Roman Missal. Eucharistic Prayer VI. Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana.

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